It's unusual to have such a troublesome RAV4. But you can't get one with a V6 anymore anyway.
The Toyota 4Runner is probably the most reliable SUV. But if you think fuel economy was bad with the RAV4...
The current Subaru Forester has been reliable so far. The records of past generations have been spotty once they pass the 160,000 km mark, though. It's too early to say how the current Forester will fare when it's that old. For what it's worth, while the current Subaru engine had oil consumption problems its first few years, it doesn't seem to share the old engine's head gasket issues. Visibility is a strength, and the XT is very quick.
I like how the current Kia Sorento drives, but first-year reliability has not been good, and I have no idea how it'll fare when well out of warranty.
If you think a Toyota RAV4 has been too expensive to maintain, you should avoid anything European, including the Audi.
Overall, of the vehicles that fit your criteria the Forester XT is probably your best bet, but getting one to 400,000 km is far from a sure thing.
The Toyota Highlander is larger and more expensive, you can't see out of it as well, and fuel economy will be worse, but among quick crossovers it probably stands the best chance of remaining reliable for the very long haul.