4WD SUV, Reliable, Capable in Snow, V8 and 3rd row a plus

Suggest you look at Ford Flex, amazing machine, very spacious, very solid body,
rates most re buyable car in consumer reports, mine has been excellent.

I am NOT going to sell you on the premium choices, indeed I will reinforce your concerns.

With the latest generations of the premium brands (say, the last 10 years or so), this is what I tell friends and family: the only way you should get one is on a four-year lease, where it's under warranty (and sometimes free maintenance), and pony up for the end-of-lease damage insurance. Do NOT buy one used.

Why? It's not a simple question of reliability (though that's important), but because the lux manufacturers have gone crazy on the pricing of their parts. A headlight assembly will go for over $2K; recently a friend's BMW X3 lost it's fin antennae. Replacement cost? $1,000. There's way too much stuff that costs way too much money on today's luxury brands. Avoid them when they're out of warranty.

As for your options, I too say the Grand Cherokee as a great choice, but share your concerns about reliability.

If you don't mind the looks of the 4Runner (I do), I'd say that $4K premium is worth it; a couple of mechanical repairs on the Jeep (or even only one), will even it out with the 4Runner. There's a reason they hold a higher resale value -- cause they're worth it.

Or, if you can find one, run, don't walk, to get a diesel Grand Cherokee from the previous generation.

Any European SUV that costs $16k will be expensive to maintain. Otherwise they'd be worth more.

The Pathfinders that have CVTs will cost more than $16k, because they've only been around since 2013. The older ones were trucks. Not as reliable as a Toyota 4Runner, but then nothing else in the segment is. Possibly worth a look.

If you really want space and towing, the Ford Expedition is probably your best bet. Reliability is about average, but probably better than the Jeep. Roomy third-row seat. If you want a large cargo area behind the third row, see if you can find the long-wheelbase Expedition EL in your price range.

Toyota also offers a large conventional SUV, the Sequoia. They might be expensive used, though, and I don't know how much more reliable they are than the Ford, while having less space inside.

The Acura MDX has sportier handling, but much less space in the third row and isn't nearly as good a choice for towing.

Among Chrysler products, the Dodge Durango is essentially a Jeep Grand Cherokee with a third row and a slightly lower price. It's probably a better choice than the Jeep if you can find one 2011 and up within your price range.